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♪Sing a little song for me...   
07:48pm 14/04/2003
mood: tired
Lets all get up and dance to a song
♪ I'm very tired... my head is spinning like a record...
Though she was born a long long time ago...
♪ Why do I only do things for pretences
You're mother should know
♪ Leave me deamons...
     Read 1 - Post
Theres no home for you here girl go away   
02:44pm 13/04/2003
mood: drained
►My leg hurts. My eyes hurt from not seeing. I want to read but the words colapse into unrecognisable symbols and burn at the back of my head.

▲I wish I was something I'm not. I think the pink in my hair is fading. Fix it with a bit of broken glass and some chardonay.

▼I only know what I'm doing and I need to do. Complicated by self doubt unworthy adversaries I run into an abyss of pathos

◄You're born ignorant- only a select few can stay that way.
     Read 1 - Post
Pheh... rancid poetry for the rotting soul   
02:29pm 13/04/2003
mood: exanimate
::I walk a maze of partial light and thing of all the sins of life

::Before me groan the unmasked shades of penitence with out an age

::I stumble through the muck and mire past the villans who conspire

::After this I tremble lo, the souls they've gotten worse to show

::I follow masqued with fear and dread into the pits of all the dead

::And when I lay the book to rest I pray I'm of the heaven sent
I see the light... er... no wait just a hallusination   
11:44am 11/04/2003
mood: cold
//Behhhk. You heard me dammit.

\\Last night I realised why I hate myself- why I think I'm the worst person in the world.

//Cause I'm a teenager

\\Dear God! Run RUN!

//Yea any way, missed part of my teleclass today because I feel asleep =_=;; My teacher didn't get to mad but I was so upset... stupid LaLa STUPID...

\\I need to work on my collective- really it's kind of annoying that I haven't had something blithe on the web in awhile. Will work on that today.

//Oh and I must finish Inferno - grr... Dante rAwks my s0cks

Dear fuck it's been to long   
06:17pm 10/04/2003
  Really it's been to long. I think I'll start writing here again. Just a place to vent. I think it's been long enough that no one will be reading. Yum

Talking to some one I made friends with online... my mother got mad at me when she read I told him I was his muse of penis enlightenment. Glory and hells bells. But she gave me the finger and so it turned out ok in the end. I've come to realise I'm totally cowed by my parents. It's rather emberassing.

Phweee... my little speck of awesome likes "The Royal Tenenbaums". I want to curl up in mad crazy giggle fits and die right this second. Oh if I could only be his muse - I hope that in some half crazed way I am. Mmm.

Well I should eat. I'm hungry.

05:21pm 21/01/2003
  LOLZ- that's right... after countless searching and being a lazy pain in the ass I have decided to return to my lovely LiVEJOURNAL (TM)!! Oh the joys of trade marked bliss...

man man man- not like everything in the world hasn't fallen down around my ankles- but this is the way things hang at the moment...

I've coughed so long and so hard I've pulled, possibly torn muscles in my chest and sides- and I've got the cartlidge between the ribs all inflamed so all in all it hurts to breath, let alone put on a bra ((OH GOD it hurts to wear a bra -wince-))

Phwee- I think Phil-san blocked my ass. Mhm I really think it to be so. I'm supposing it was after I laughed at him and Slut... well I was on so many painkillers, it was just so funny to see him all dressed up for LotR- but then again the way the birds landed in the fake palms seemed REALLY funny too... whoo yea. Pain.

I think this is gonna be where I rap it up dude- I'm in pain. Oiiii.
06:57pm 19/04/2002
mood: chipper
Heh- konyonachi wa minna-san! nn;; VERY long time no write eh eh?? @_@ b

@ Tika's home right now ((she is *SO* sugoi and and anddddd.... yea!)) ok um... ....yea

Dan lemme braid his hair and Chico-kun lemme put pigtails in hers ((inbetween her snuggling with her Kennan =3 so sugoi)) ... so so so so sooooo yea!

Dear Lord. Must go. YEA! @_@; lol

GR my father sucks ass! NYAH!!


[Nikko signed out @ 7:01 P of M]
06:17pm 28/03/2002

I Died then my Instinct was BORN

You are Shinshoku -lose control- ..and you are a complete psycho.
Your pastime is scaring old people on the bus,
and i'm guessing you were released from the mental ward a little too early.
Hey!! Stop eating those butterflies!! o_O

"Which L'Arc~en~Ciel song am I?" test by mifyuu</b>

06:46pm 27/03/2002
mood: pessimistic
No offence Mike but I will never truly understand you as far as your romantic endevors are concerned. Do you still like Chibi? And Tika? And Alaia? And Tiffany? And what about the girl on the phone? Are you dating? @_@;; Too many twists for mah poor blonde brain to comprehend...

...you know what I just realised? Why is hair colour associated with braincells? o_O;; ... ok whatever. BOO!

.... last night on the phone Phil-kun said in essence I was smart but I was kinda a slacker. ... -_- ; ehhhhhh------ true ... and I pesterd him for it but still -- ... I'm working damn hard and I always keep up my grades- except when Pippen eats my soul then I slip but yea. -_-;;; Oh and--- what IS it with guys and constant huggies? o_O:; Sometimes I need a liiiil' space you know... and I'm scared to say something lest I look like a bitch.... ...**cou-Erik-gh** ....

... can you tell that I'm in pain? Betcha' can can can- stupid eye doctor dialated my pupils- and I tried to lie down with no lights.... reading and anything close is near to impossible.... but it was driving me insane lying there and simply thinking thinking thinking........... GAH! @_@;; WhooooooooNk.

...why don't people comment in my journal? I'm that boring? That much of a bitch?

Thanks love you too.


bite me. THE PAIN THE PAIN! @_@

[Nikko signed off @ 6:52 P of M]
     Read 4 - Post
Ai ai ai , where's my sammuri?   
02:26pm 27/03/2002
mood: happy
Hey world.

My sister made it into the VPA! ^_^ I'm so muchly proud of her- allthough she was worried I knew she'd make it.... n.n b goooo nut-meg! XD

^^;; In other news- I've been playing DDR like, as much as I can @_@;; b my dad put in the mod chip on Monday evening and ever sence I've been like yea n.n;; I'm slowly but surley getting better- only like, once did I fail and that's because I tripped over my own two feets @_@;; lol baka Nikko...

Kirsti is suuuch a sweetii!! ^^= She sented me a note and I wrote back with some crapp art of mine ((Zechs sweating and blushing while unknown hand strokes his cheek.... o_O;; I hope it wasn't Treize's hand x_X;; y.u.c.k.ii))--- any how she said she wants to get to know me more and that contrary to wha I think I'm not a loser and I'm awesome and yea. Now to write my note to Heather-chan, who is just as cool as Kirsti ((she makes her bishounen her husbands!! ^___^;; I think she was in the fourties last time I checked...)) -- oh oh oh and Kirsti is a D fan! -_- Not as big as me because well that just isn't happening ((lol ;; )) but that's just sooo coool ne?! ^_^

And and Mike might give me Tokyo Babalon- he's gonna give it to me or to Kim who'm he --- .... neveeeer mind I'm not sure I should say that n.n;; -- any way I hope I get it >.< ,, b Subaru and Seishiro-sama are sooooo perfectly wonderful !!! =3 Many happy times of melting and lub....

o_< Bastment Jaxx Where's your head at kicks man--- >D I think it should be "Where's your head at bitch" but um... I think that's a little more than any one needs right?

Viola and Kenny took a vow of like, self "celibacy" ((aka their hands are no long their best friend)) for 2 weeks- XD Viola's being sooo mean to Ken Ken and shiz doing "naughty" things ... lol n.n;; heh.

And I finished "The Queen of the Damned" -- truuuust me read the book-- it's sooo much better than the movie.... >.<;; I haven't even seen it except for preveiws but question- did the twins even get major roles in it? o_O;; I mean they couldn't have been left out sence they were like.... majorly big in the plot line @_@;

=D Ah, all life smells like strawberrys.

[Nikko signed off @ 2:41 P of M]
11:55am 21/03/2002
T e s t i</sub> n g.... .....
11:36am 21/03/2002
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<img src="http://rumandmonkey.com/widgets/tests/criminal/elizabethbathory.jpg" title="I am Elizabeth Bathory."><br \><a href="http://rumandmonkey.com/widgets/tests/criminal/">Which Evil Criminal are <i>You</i>?</a>

11:33am 21/03/2002
What kind of drunk are you?

yea that's fun.... -_-;
Again again again I say....!   
08:34pm 20/03/2002

I took the Bust A Groove 2 character selector here!

Made by: Pixy Teri. Take it too!

o. O;; when'd I go back 2 years in age...?

Test Results

You think of yourself as being Caring, Helpful, Soft, and Comforting.
Others think of you as being Hyper, Sweet, Caring, and Bouncy.
Your relationships can be described as Calm, Peaceful, Sedated, and Pretty.
When stressed, you feel alone.
Take this test here.

o_O;; I really DO feel alone when I'm stressed... like I'm trapped in my brain and can't get out to get some on to help me....

Nemukko Nyago
Which Sanrio character are you?
by woofiegrrl

sleep.... nummy~!

What Psych-Ward do you belong to?


Oooooooh yea- kiss my pasty white ass babii!

take the death quiz.

and go to mewing.net. laura = great.

um.... that quiz scares me >_<,,

"You are worth exactly: $1,725,862.00.

We hope you can find somebody who is wealthy enough to afford you.

o. O;; Whaaaaa....

<td bgcolor="green">
You Are

You are a beautiful person, in a wistful kind of way. If you could, you would spend all your time daydreaming and writing poetry. You are a tragic beauty.

You are sensitive and caring, and you don't take insults well. You don't smile much, but when you do, you really mean it.

People like to be around you because you are a calming influence. You have an appreciation for all things beautiful, and you probably have some potted plants. You also most likely own a cat.

You like Sundays and hot tea. You will spend your entire life yearning for quiet beauty, which is a rarity in this world, so you read a lot.

Everyone you know thinks you're "nice."

Take the Which Led Zeppelin Song Are You? Quiz

nice thought but.... o_O;; really?

I am 37.5% British, just like
Just as happy in LA or London. Aren't the narrow roads in the UK quaint.

Take the Brit Quiz at

Quiz written by Daz daz71

Yanks rAwk ya hear me Britts?!
06:51pm 20/03/2002
  I am a Brujah!

Yooooshiiiii you RAAAWK!!!!

05:48pm 20/03/2002
mood: excited

You lucky son of a bitch, you're Kaoru. Well, luck had nothing to do with it if we're right- you made sure you got where you are now with your intellect and hard work. You prefer to be in the lead, but not nessisarily the spot light. Over all your a hard working compassionet person. Go You man!

Take the Test Here!

That's my quiz my quiz!!!! >_<,, I hope it works- only a few minor adjustments and it shall be ready for people!!!! o*_*o and yes I took it correctly-- >_<,
My bowels are trying to eat me   
05:27pm 20/03/2002
mood: good
....yea odd comment but my stomach hurts very badly...
....maybe I shouldn't keep popping those Cream Savers? Naaah.

I am muchly happy- why? I got myself some sugoiiiii stuffs' from Books a Million- InuYasha # 10, and Fushigi Yuugi # 6 -- and the COOLEST- Queen of the Damned by Anne Rice!! XD Lestat you sezzy sezzy bitch....

SPEAKING of which....

Go here -- must visit for a Dir fan on the prowl for coo' piccies.

This girl I met @ Oriental trader said if I'm into Dir I'll probably enjoy Malice Mizer.... dunno dunno must d/l songs and if I enjoy I shall buy CD from OT-- they FINALLY got in JRock-- it's up at the front and it's like "YAY!" n.n;; they tried to sell me the Musak vId's from deg, but I allready had it----- >_^ b hee!

Oh and whilest my train of thought remains on DEG, I made a quiz, which I shall upload shortly onto my server, and I think my new layout will either be the grapic thingy I did out of sheer boredom or a DEG one. Obssessed? Me?? O_O YES!

OH and I'm gonna buy myself Angelique- only 7.50$ -- >_<,, all those pretty bishounen in one manga... whee.

Any one know where to buy any of the games?? o_O?

[Nikko signed out @ 5:35 P of M]
09:40am 19/03/2002
mood: excited

which Shakira are you?

by divachop and phantomx86


Which Rock Chick Are You?

I'm a Jrock fangirl
So what if the guys look like girls? They're pretty and have cool outfits and their music is the best. Give me Dir en Grey over Ayumi any day.

What kind of fangirl are you?

Xd Like we didn't see THAT one coming ... lol...

ANY way- Hiiiitttooomiiiii ish back!!!!~nyuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!

She went all the way to New York and and and and yea!!! And and she said she'd go to the big manga store for us and buy us stuff, and and I asked for Gravitation, Yami no Matsuei and Angelique--- I wonder if she got it >_< o# Oh so excited yo!!!

>P Aw fuck my brain is sort of spasming.... will leave...

.......OH and more GREAT news -- Daddy got a raaaise!!! >_<,,, Soooooooo geeeeeeeeeeeenki~nyuuuu!

[Nikko signed out @ 9:45 A of M]
10:28pm 17/03/2002
mood: exhausted

I was re-reading the entry below... "...what is wrong with me" ...you want to know the scarey thing?

... I don't remeber writing that.

it's funny I usually forget ((probably block)) the times I'm most depressed but I can't remeber writing that.... oh well not like it matters to you all...

**sigh** Phil-sama is going to be gone all spring breakyyuuuuu.... Dominican Republic Vacation.... ..... I'm missing him allready- what will I do this summer when he's gone 6 weeks? In Japan?

With all those pretty Japanese girls who are so much cooler than me?

I'm so scared....

but I should trust him right? I should love him for whatever he chooses right?!!!

I'm so tired and depressed the screen is swiming before my eyes.. I think I need to go to sleep.

[Nikko signed off @ 10:37 P of M]
Human nature discusts me at times   
11:09pm 15/03/2002
mood: shocked
.....if ever one were to try to cram the entire documentary of the fall of human civilization, their corrupt discusting tendencies, and their unquenchable need for the spot light into a two hour film, one could do nothing more perfect than Resident Evil.

Ok shooting my mouth off here is probably going to earn me more than my share of hateful comments but you all can fuck off and listen to me.

The fact that no one cared that the "things" in the movie were at one point humans disturbed me. The fact that when the one chara's sister turned zombie was murdered people clapped distubed me deeply. But then again maybe the fact that the two people next to us were under the ages of fucking 5 and 4, maybe that was the major clue that we have fucking fallen into nothing. It's not an issue any more that people around us are hurt. It's no longer a problem to watch sensless death, violence, all aimed at something that once had a soul, once had a mind, once was a living breathing entity. You ever think what it'd be like if it came true? Were at a fucking age folks were it not all that much of a dream. in the end violence is violence. Acted or not it's there and we need to try and stamp it out, not increase it.


I mean, you'd think that there would be moments when people would think, "Hey- why were these stories written.... who could have thought something so horrible sadistic? Why am I paying money- why am I encouraging it?"

We feed into the hands of terrorists. They simply watch us spending more money on a single film than some third world counties GPA. They watch us then enjoying a movie of gun slinging, ass kicking, head blowing violence. And we gasp and tut-tut when they strike back. Even if some one wrote a movie about September 11 before it happened- you want to know the reaction? It would probably be "Wow that's sweet man" "Yea did you see the camera angles as that one dudes head split in half?!" "I know- it was like, sooo cool watching that guy burn baby!"

... I suddenly realise- ...I am not a perfect human. I'm good though- because if the people who write this shit; the people who enjoy grotesqu displays of man power and violence rolled into one nice neat evil-corporation package; are the root of all these horribly discusting things around me- the people who pollute this world with their trash and their minds full of hate and instant gratification.... if these are bad - I am most certinly NOT in the same boat as them.

And to you all who enjoyed it I ask you to think long and hard about that decision.

and for those of you who want to know why I stayed- it was so I could be with my boy friend, ((who FYI didn't like it either)).

the movie was horrible- but the reactions of people.......were far more disturbing than anything they could have put on that screen

I have no words left for this.

[Nikko signed off @ 11:26 P of M]